Motivational Workshop

The past 3 days have honestly taught me so so much. It wasn't much of a motivational workshop but more of this journey of self-discovery and acceptance. I've met the nicest and most real people in my life in the short 3 days and they have touched me. It doesn't matter whether in future we meet again, or not, because that can't change the fact that they have really indeed left footprints in my heart. Got much closer to 4L once again and also with the Churchill United babes. I never had so much fun in my life before. I can't honestly say that I came out of the workshop feeling like a different person, or seeing the world differently- I haven't changed. But I know that this workshop has taught me so many things that I may never in my life would have known and that small bit has made life seem less fuzzy and uncertain. I really enjoyed these 3 days and I wouldn't mind reliving every single moment again. :')

Hush now

There's something really comforting about sitting alone in the dark with little kinder and listening to the silence of the night. The soft rustle of the leaves, the tiny chatter of people and just watching shadows dance. But it makes me sad, too. Because it makes me think. It makes me think of all the missed opportunities and untreasured second chances. What a life I have been living.
Silence is a beautiful thing. But it can also be terribly dreadful.

2201

Had a really hugeass craving for tang yuan during chem on Thurs and ahma brought me to buy after school awwh love her to bits. Went over to her place to eat so that we could share <3

On the same day, I had the best macaroons ever flown in from France :-) They are so small and delicate and they taste so amazing. Esp the rose omg. And the marshmallow grape.

I think the ones from Pierre Herme are better but I haven't gotten the chance to try :-(

On Friday we had the class performance and I was the sun yay :-)

I'm so glad we've become so bonded over the past week aaah. Our whatsapp group just erupts into messages after messages, photos after photos. I love 4L'13 I really do. 

After training, Jac and I went to meet Evan to go for the healing session at Novena church! We grabbed dinner at Monster Ramen and walked over.

 It was such a great night and such a great way to start the new school year. Regrowing and renewing your faith brings to you a feeling impossible to describe. It's like your whole body collapses into a calm and you stop worrying. It's a nice feeling.

CIP with Rui Ching and Yuci on Sat night! IT WAS SO FUN HAHA BEST CIP EVER. Basically we just had to mend the photo booth and make sure the people don't steal the props away. It's truly a blessing to see others so happy, esp the elderly. They were all so excited to get their photos taken and even more excited that it was free and that they could keep a copy. Idk it was a really fun and meaningful one :-)

After the booth closed to the public we started spamming photos and it was so fun hahaha! 

Went out with my Shannon Bouncybababa on Sunday for retail therapy and makan parade :-)

Queued 30 mins for XLB at Paradise Dynasty but it was so worth it.

Decided to order fried rice too and it was jsfjawesomeoiujekf. I love food I really do.

I love talking to this girl too lah omg. I really can tell her everything and pour out all my feelings to her aka my anger and annoyance AND SHE UNDERSTANDS HOW I FEEL. With her, it's those conversations where you can just talk without thinking and there are no awkward pauses and everyone's just fighting to speak. Like there's never and end and even if there is, it's to take a sip of water HAHA. 

Headed over to scape after lunch and bought some accessories!

Then we went to eat more food after shopping for a teensy bit haha.

Super duper fun day with this bitch <3

"Come to gate now I m here, bring u lunch"

I LOVE MY AHMA SO MUCH. Had such a great lunch with her and my aunt <3 

She's damn qt I tell you omg she loves waffles so much she wants a waffle maker so that she can "eat waffles everyday for breakfast lunch and dinner and supper with satay sauce and vanilla ice cream and cream cheese" so that she can "die in waffle heaven".

I remember how when I was young I used to always find her so naggy and would always talk back and throw tantrums and I really really regret it now. Maybe I couldn't see it when I was young but now I know how much she loves me and how she shows her love so subtly through the things she does for me. And I want her to know how much I love her too. Honestly I hate myself for always putting other things before her because at the end of the day, she's the one who cares for me the most and is always here for me when I need her. It's time to wisen up, yumin, please learn to start prioritizing.

"For each person who gets into the team, one person gets out. You owe it to them."
Gonna work triply hard for zonals so that I won't let myself or anyone down. Our group is such a tough group and if we want to get through to the next round, I know we have to work super hard to earn it. Not gonna slack anymore. Game on.

eyeballs

Today in Bio we dissected eyeballs. Cutting the fats from the eyeball was the most tedious and scariest thing ever. But it was so much fun nonetheless and definitely a once in a lifetime experience HAHA.

I hate my life. I don't want to be here. I want to cry and cry and flush myself into another life. Don't you dare say that I'm being a spoilt brat and don't know how lucky I am to be in this life. I am telling you now that you wouldn't want to be me. I seem ok and happy because that's what I choose to show you. None of you know half the things that I go through. I'm crumbling behind this facade.

3

"Lord, our God. I pray that you grant us all acceptance. We do well, we praise you, we do average, we praise you, we do badly, we also praise you."
Ms Law gave an opening prayer for us today before SS started. I feel at ease. Like I said, I didn't have any expectations of myself thus even though I didn't do well, I'm gonna take this as a wake up call. No more fooling around in class and no more cases of not studying before a test. I'm gonna work super hard this year towards what I want to achieve and pray that I do achieve it.

To all those who collected their results today, honestly, whatever you got is just a digit. This digit may or may not get you far in life but really, it's not important. Many success stories come from failures. What's important is you pick yourself up from your failures. As long as you progress, everything will turn out fine in the end. :-)

Vannie babi came over after school yesterday and it was so much fun. :') We ate lunch and I made her green milk tea and we went up to the stairs landing to watch the rain. Talked about everything under the sun and decided to go up to watch pitch perfect. BUT it stopped loading halfway and we ended up taking loads of photos hahaha. It was so exhausting omg but it was so fun hahaha. Couldn't stop laughing at our faces (the ones here are the best you don't want to see the worst ones hahahaha) every time we reviewed the photos.

And today I went to class and found this under my table :') 

Dearest Evan: Thanks for being the best friend any one could ever ask for. Your selfless nature inspires so many of us to be better people. You always put other before yourself and you always make sure that others are happy because that's what makes you happy. I don't think there's anyone as special as you and I really love you so much. You're someone I can always go to because I know you always have the right words to say. I just really wanted to tell you how much you mean to me and how big a role you play in my life. You're amazing Vannie, and I really truly mean it. <3

School was really great today too even though lessons were so boring. Had so much fun in PE especially when playing against Daphne's team and Val's team. We were literally breathless from laughing and running haha. But geog was horrible it was like I was present but my soul wasn't there? But towards the end it got better because we wrote the number of minutes before school ends on a piece of paper and strike off every time a minute passes. It got more bearable. 

Training was fine haha it was fun actually and super funny. I love the team I really do. We aren't as bonded as when we were b'div with the seniors but we're fine. I think I really need to urge myself to be more consistent in shooting in the morning because my shots lately have been terrible. Season's coming and I feel unprepared. I remember this time last year and I really miss the seniors a whole lot. 

Getting back the Chinese O's results tomorrow and I don't know what to feel. I don't expect much of myself and I honestly don't really care about what I get but I'm still nervous. Maybe the reality hasn't fully sunk in yet but I think tomorrow nearing the results I'll be a wreck. I know I did badly because I really didn't put an effort to study or practice much and I did the paper and I have a gauge of how badly I did but I'm really hoping I don't do too badly. 

Oh well.

crossroads

2012

Getting into the christmas spirit 

Playdate with Shannon Bouncysmack on Christmas Eve. Went to make our own sushi and shopped for christmas presents and take photos in the bushes 

This was followed by Christmas Eve dinner with the family and daddy's friends

+... (I can't find the other photos of the other courses so just live with this)

Christmas dinner with the whole family like the usual sunday bunch and it was so lovely. The house blacked out half way and we decided to just light candles and the ambiance was perfect haha. Slow jazzy christmas songs + cranberry pear bellini candles + turkey and champagne ham and potato salad and roast beef and shepherd's pie and teriyaki chicken + great company :')

Went to ikea with the mother on Boxing Day and headed to town afterwards. Saw a wallet that really caught my eye and I wanted it so bad but the price wasn't nice at all. But anyway it was such a fun day with the mothership haha she's such a goofball sometimes I love you so much mommy <3 

Then I came home trying to find my wallet and I couldn't and I realised I lost it on Christmas Eve and it probably dropped after tapping out of the station. 

Please look at how pathetic my wallet is now omg 

I really wanted to cry and at that point and the fact that I lost my wallet with all my cards and money and letters and concert tickets and movie stubs finally sank in and I felt so overwhelmed and sad. (On a side note I never had so much money in my wallet since we moved back to the AMK site cause they didn't have ATMs as conveniently as the TPY holding site HAHA) 

Christmas Eve lunch with my gaypalz is da bombz. We laughed so much at NYDC and continued laughing as hard even when we went to coffee bean. Everything was so hilarious and it was such a great way to end the year.

Went home and make my jar of memories with my 2013 resolutions written on it.

2013

New Year's brunch at Cedele with the parents <3

Walked my little lion and brought him to a different park for the new year haha.

Had a mille crepe cake to celebrate the new year at the grandparents' house yum.

First day of school ended with so many presents I love my friends so much I really truly do. I honestly don't bother about the worth of the gifts but the thought behind them means so much and just awwh <3 

Anyway look at these super cute tennis ball gums Evan got!!!

And on Thursday after a long day at school (Talent discovery + Math consultation with Miss Choo) I came home to the wallet that I really really wanted :')

I honestly didn't think that my parents would actually go and buy this for me especially since I just lost my wallet. Don't get me wrong, I really loved it but I just didn't think much of it, yknow? But it was such a lovely thing to come home to and I really don't know how to express my love for them aah. 

On Fri we went to make a police report for my lost wallet and on Sat daddy lost the report. So mommy was like "Why not you go make a police report to report the loss of a police report" HAHAHA /facepalm.

(P/s: Yesterday during math lesson I got a whatsapp notification. "You have been added to the group "Lost Wallet". 

Momo: Guess what 

Me: What 

Daddy: ? 

Momo: Your wallet has been found.

Me: OMG SRSLY WHERE. DID THE GUY TAKE MY THINGS?

Momo: No

Me: WAH HE DAMN NICE EH

Momo: You know why

Me: Cause got no money inside right HAHA

Momo: Cause it was in my car all along

Daddy: Walao

That sums up my life HAHAHA.